


Blame

by Spooky66



Series: Prompts [58]
Category: The X-Files
Genre: Angst, Episode s09e20: The Truth, Gen, William - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-01
Updated: 2018-01-01
Packaged: 2019-02-26 05:47:35
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 597
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13229307
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Spooky66/pseuds/Spooky66
Summary: Tumblr prompt: "for the ship thing; 9 for Mulder/Skinner friend-ship; Thank you :)"9. things you said when I was crying





	Blame

“Dammit!” I shout and pound the floor. How could she? How could she just give him up like that? And not even fucking tell me. 

Instead, I’m hearing it from Skinner, of all people. 

I feel the tears start and they fall before I can stop them. I hate myself for crying but for months all I have thought about was William and Scully. I had all these fantasies of what kind of a family we would be and how wonderful it would be. Of course, all of the fantasies were bull shit. I could never have that kind of life.

“I just… I don’t understand.” I say trying to hold back the sobs. 

Skinner is awkwardly looking at his shoes. 

“She was scared that someone would take him and use him for something terrible. After seeing how easy it had been for Jeffery to get to him she couldn’t stand the thought of who else could find him and hurt him.” 

I figured these were the answers, in fact, Skinner had already told me all of this but I needed to hear it again. Pacing, I wondered how I would face Scully again. Part of me wanted to hold her and apologize for leaving her to make such a choice alone and the other part wanted to shake and yell at her for giving up our son. My son. 

There was also some of me that felt like I never deserved to be a part of William’s life anyway, and this was for the best. 

“Go easy on her, please Mulder. I’m only telling you this because I think she’s been through too much already. I want you to have time to think about it and calm down before she tells you.” 

I glare at him through wet eyes, “You seem awfully concerned with her emotional state Walter.” 

Skinner stiffens. For years I’ve known of the secret torch he holds for Scully but have never mentioned it. I know nothing would have happened between them. Walter would never do that, he is too honorable. And Scully… Well, I’m not sure I know what Scully would do anymore. But I know nothing has happened between them, I am just lashing out. 

Skinner seems to know this too. 

“Mulder, we’re all worried about Scully. She has dreaded telling you about William.” 

I wave him off and continue to pace, “It’s not her fault, well it’s not all her fault. I wasn’t here. I can’t complain.” 

“Don’t do that either.” He says then and I stop. 

“Do what?” 

“Blame yourself. This is an impossible situation. Both of you are just doing the best you can. This is the kind of thing that can drag a relationship down and kill it, you need to not let that happen. Mulder, whatever happens now you only have each other. Of course, Doggett, Reyes, and I will be there to support you but in the end, it’s the same as it’s always been: you and Scully against the world. Don’t ruin the only good thing you have left.” 

The sobs come then because I know he’s right. 

At first, Skinner stands there awkwardly, not watching my display. So I’m surprised when I feel him pat my shoulder comfortingly if a little uncomfortably. 

We stand there like that for some time until the guard tells Skinner it’s time to leave. Skinner gives me one final pat on the back and a look to remind me to be good to Scully before he leaves. 

I spend the rest of the afternoon crying in my cell.


End file.
